I’m guilty!

Posted in Culture, Reflections on August 19, 2009 by joetheyouthpastor

It’s been a guilt-filled morning for me, but I think in a good way. I was reading one of the guest posts at morethandodgeball.com, and it spoke truth into my life. This guy, Mark Cox, was writing about an almost-encounter he had in Wal-Mart recently. He describes walking down an aisle and overhearing one person say to another, “Today’s teenagers just don’t have any respect for anyone these days. It’s a problem with the whole generation.”

He goes on to rant (just a little bit) about how, as someone who is technically part of “the whole generation” in question, he took offense to this person’s comment. He states, quite correctly, that teenagers in general do not have a blatant disregard for authority, or a sick sense of pleasure in ruining the established order. They are simply still learning how do “do life”, and the last thing they need is discouragement and negative affirmation. As I read, I began to realize on how many accounts I’m guilty in this whole situation. Let me list them out.

I’m guilty – Of being part of “this whole generation”. I will turn 25 in a couple of weeks, so it has been awhile since I’ve been a teenager, but I’m still part of the Millennial Generation (graduating class of 2000 and onwards). I grew up with MTV. I can’t clearly remember life before cell phones. I spend a (probably more than) reasonable amount of time on the internet, watching TV, playing video games, and listening to music.

I’m guilty – Of bashing “this whole generation”. I have always gravitated towards those who are older and more mature than myself. As a result, I sometimes forget that I’m a part of the same generation that some older folks like to bash. I’m on the front-end of the generation, but that’s no excuse. Like Cox says in his blog post, I should be leading the way for those who come behind me.

I’m guilty – Of not leading the way effectively. If the middle and tail-end of “this whole generation” turns out crappy, I am at least partially to blame. Why? Because mountains of research back up the fact that, even though on many levels parents are still the primary influence on adolescent behavior, peer groups are an ever-increasing influence on the lives of young people. If the people who are only a few years younger than me are screwed up and worthless, then at least part of the reason for that is that I have done a poor job exerting positive influence on them.

I’m guilty – Of not recognizing that to characterize “this whole generation” as anything is shallow and near-sighted on my part. Including people that I went to middle/high school and college with, people I pastor now, and random teenagers I’ve seen in traffic, the mall, etc., I might actually have encountered 5000 young people (my middle/high school experience was about 3000, about 1000 in college, and probably less than that since then.). For me to make a judgment about an entire generation of more than 40 million people based on my encounters with, let’s get crazy and call it 10000, is ludicrous. The same thing happened in the late ’60s. People look back on that time and think about how powerful and influential and pervasive the “hippie culture” was. Hippies accounted for, at the largest estimates, no more than 1% of that generation. I don’t have any data to prove this, but I would be willing to bet that a vast majority of “this whole generation” don’t live up to their stereotype as disrespectful delinquents.

So that’s it. Guilty as charged. I’m a well-adjusted, responsible, thoughtful citizen. I have made mistakes, but have learned from them, and am still learning how to ‘do life’ better. I’m a Millennial. And I’m proud to be one.



God views the heart

Posted in Reflections, Theological with tags , , on August 17, 2009 by joetheyouthpastor

The sermon this week focused on Solomon and how he pursued wisdom. Something else jumped out at me, though. It’s an affirmation of something that we all know in terms of head knowledge, but fail to turn into heart knowledge oftentimes: God cares more about your heart than he does about your actions.

An insincere heart would read that statement and think, “So I can have a heart devoted to God, and still do whatever I want… Awesome.” That, however, would betray the heart as insincere. A heart devoted to God will not seek to do whatever it wants, but will seek to do what God wants. The intention will be there, even if the proper actions aren’t. Like in this story of Solomon from 1 Kings 3:1-14.

At this time. the Israelites were worshiping at the ‘high places’, altars to foreign gods that had been built on hills and plateaus in the past. Israel had strayed from God for so long that many people no longer knew that, according to God’s law, the only proper place to offer a sacrifice to the Lord was in Jerusalem. Solomon was no different. For much of his life, everyone had sacrificed to God at the high places. Why should he do any differently? Yet, because his heart was so sincere, this passage tells us that God looked at Solomon and was pleased with the intention of his heart, even though, according to the letter of the law, Solomon had sinned by not sacrificing in Jerusalem.

The moral of the story – don’t get hung up on what’s “proper”. When your actions are governed by love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, and self-control, there is no law against them.


Sudden Death and Wisdom

Posted in Reflections, Theological on August 10, 2009 by joetheyouthpastor

Wow, first post in forever!

I was doing some research today for our upcoming worship service, and ran across a verse that I must have read before – Psalm 90:12 – but never thought about as an answer to one of life’s tough questions. Whenever there’s an unexpected death (an accident, sudden illness, disaster, etc.) someone always asks the ‘why?’ question; why did this happen?, why did this person have to be the one?

As I was reading through some scripture today, Psalm 90:12 jumped out at me – ‘Teach us the brevity of life, so that we may grow in wisdom.’ That says to me that sometimes people we care about die so that we have the opportunity to gain wisdom by recognizing how fragile life is and how much we need to rely on God.

Maybe that will give you some hope and some answers if you’ve experienced a loss recently.


The Idiot File

Posted in Uncategorized on July 1, 2009 by joetheyouthpastor

Here’s a news article straight out of the idiot file. Check it and then come back for my advice to these parents…


The hearts of Junior Highers

Posted in Reflections on June 27, 2009 by joetheyouthpastor

I am recovering today after a long week of camp for junior high school students. It was my first time being the dean of a week of camp. Stressful – yes. Tiring – yes. Exhausting – yes. Rewarding – ministry always is. Painful? – yes.

Maybe it’s just my youth and relative inexperience in ministry (I’ve been at it 3 years), but I never cease to be amazed when God allows me to see into the hearts of junior high school students. That happened this week, and I want to share a couple of examples that I believe are indicative of junior highers as a whole. I’ll change names since some people that I know and that know these kids read this blog occasionaly.

Allison – Allison might have been the prettiest girl at camp this week. She was tall, skinny, and, when she let her guard down, had a great personality. The problem was that, most of the time, her guard was up. She was aloof, seemed disinterested, disrespectful, and was focused almost entirely on her camp ‘boyfriend’. In terms of physical appearance, she looked like one of those young people who are trying very hard to make people think they’re not trying at all. Know what I mean?

But Allison’s bravado and aloofness was all a show. One of the female counselors in her cabin told me that, as pretty and in shape as she was, she was the most vocal girl in her cabin about how much she hated her own body. This girl is probably 5’9″ and about 120 pounds, and she complained almost constantly about her weight when in the cabin. When she thought no one was looking, she would un-guard her facial expression, and the pain and insecurity in her life was as visible as if it was written there with a marker. It was utterly heartbreaking to see such a beautiful young girl with such low self esteem.

Kristy – Kristy was another girl at camp this week who broke my heart. She came to camp with a girl she knew from home. By the end of the first full day, she had completely abandoned her friend from home in favor of the ‘cool kids’. I literally saw her running from her friend from home in order to catch up to the cool crowd on more than one occasion. At meals, she didn’t sit with her friend from home. At chapel services, she usually ended up sitting with the cool kids, without a backward glance for her friend. The message was as clear to me as I’m sure it was to her friend – “You’re not part of the cool crowd, so you’re not cool enough for me.”

The message was received. Kristy’s friend from home spent most of the week alone. The hurt on her face in her unguarded moments was heartbreaking. My heart broke for them both. To Kristy, only one question in life matters right now – “Am I part of the cool crowd or not?” Sad.

James – James is one of those kids who is a natural leader. And like so many natural leaders at this age, he has no idea at all that he is a leader. He’s one of those kids that all the other boys look up to, no matter what he does. Good or bad. They all want to do what James does. Like a lot of junior high boys, James puts on the cool/athletic/confident/charming facade. But like most junior high boys, he is every bit as insecure and self-conscious as the junior high girls. He craves attention in any form he can get it. And, unfortunately, it’s much easier for junior highers to get attention for hijinks, pranks, and misbehavior than for anything positive. So we had some trouble with James this week. He wanted to attention on him all the time, even if it meant acting out to get it. At the root of it all is his insecurity.

In fact, if I had to sum up everything I learned about junior highers this week, it could be summed up with the word ‘insecure’. Each and every one of them is struggling to find out who they are and where their place is in the world. It makes me sad, but it also gives me new energy to try to invest in their lives.

Know any junior highers? Observe them for awhile, and see if the word ‘insecurity’ doesn’t come to mind.


Bedford’s Burden

Posted in Life, Reflections with tags , , , on June 7, 2009 by joetheyouthpastor

I don’t know how much play it got where I live, but yesterday was the 65th anniversary of D-Day, the day of the massive Allied invasion of German-occupied beaches in France during World War II. It was, and is still, the largest amphibious military assault in history. I happened to be in a small town in western Virginia visiting family. As we talked, my grandmother handed me a newspaper article about her first cousin, Lucille Boggess. The article followed her as she went to Washington, D.C., to take part in a private viewing of a documentary film titled “Bedford’s Burden”. The reason – two of her brothers, my grandmother’s first cousins, were 2 of 19 men from the town of Bedford, VA, to be killed on the beaches of Normandy.

Bedford, VA, holds the dubious distinction of being the U.S. town with the highest per-capita death rate on D-Day. 19 of 34 men from Bedford were killed on June 6, 1944, while storming the French coastline, all from Company A, 116th Infantry, 29th Division. Bedford is the site of the United States’ D-Day memorial. As far as memorials go, it is fantastic. Google it. Did you Google it? See the guy facedown on the beach? That statue is inspired by the story of my grandmother’s cousin, Raymond Hoback. Raymond’s body was never recovered from the flotsam after the battle, but his Bible was. The Bible he carried had been a Christmas gift from his parents in 1938. Corporal H.W. Crayton found the Bible laying on the beach on D-Day plus one, and was kind enough to send it back to Raymond Hoback’s family.

The impact of D-Day on the town of Bedford was huge and tangible. Bedford is a small town, even today. Losing 19 young men in a single battle was roughly equivalent to losing half a generation of men from the town. It’s really not possible to overstate the importance of D-Day to the town of Bedford.

As I pondered all of this last Friday, sitting in my aunt’s living room, reading an article from the Roanoke Times, watching the local news (more than half the broadcast was devoted to D-Day celebrations the following day), it occured to me that D-Day is not just a huge deal for the history of Bedford, VA – it is a huge deal for the history of us all. If you read up some on World War II, you will quickly discover what a huge, desperate gamble the invasion of France was. The stories of gallantry, heroism, and dedication to the cause are too numerous to recount. And it is in large part because of the heroism of so many men that the Allied Armies were able to defeat some of the worst evil in human history.

If you’re not sold on why you should get excited about June 6 each year, do a quick Google search for Bedford, Virginia, and read up on some of the personal stories. For me, it’s enough to be related, however distantly, to the inspiration for a war memorial. And it’s enough to see my grandmother tear up with pride and loss (in that order, mind you) talking about her cousins who didn’t come home from France.


Best Wedding Video Ever

Posted in Life with tags , , , on June 1, 2009 by joetheyouthpastor

There’s been a trend in recent years of having the bride and groom’s first dance be a surprise boogie instead of the traditional slow dance. That’s awesome. More power to them.

I ran across this video on a blog I read, and I have to say that this tops all of the ‘Baby Got Back’ wedding dance videos out there. I hope this becomes a new trend. Congratulations, Brian and Eileen. You officially have the coolest wedding video ever. Enjoy.